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Love and Relationships

Updated: Nov 15, 2019

Although I know there is still much to learn about love and relationships and there are areas that would benefit from working on, I do feel fortunate to now have a beautiful relationship with an incredibly loving man. It has not always felt this way because I feel my childhood experiences tainted my view of what love looks like.


I grew up in an environment where my parents appeared to be in love in one moment and in the next my Father could change dramatically and become abusive, both verbally and physically. I loved my Father with all my heart and watching this behaviour deeply affected me to the point that I associated love with pain. I learnt to believe that loving someone creates hurt, and made a vow to never love anyone to that degree again. Gradually I learnt to shut down and distance myself especially with men. This seemed to serve me in my youth to a point, until I met my now husband of 34 years. It has taken a huge degree of patience and understanding on his part and years of therapy and learning to trust to open up to the love of a good man.


I look back with gratitude now for each and every experience in my life because it has helped me become more aware, and enables me to make conscious choices to facilitate a deeper understanding of what love truly is.


I recommend these simple practices (the emphasis being on practice!)


L ook within for Love


O pen the heart


V iew everything and everyone as love


E nvelop yourself in loving energy


Although I have called these exercises simple, in my experience has not been this easy and often requires guidance and a huge amount of practice and patience with myself and others.


There is growing evidence that links trauma experienced in childhood to psychological issues, including PTSD. Discover more: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com


I would love to hear your views on this subject and any experiences you have had earlier in life which you feel may have affected your ability to create healthy loving relationships and your beliefs around love.


Below are a few questions:


What was your earliest memory of a significant relationship?


How old were you?


What did you learn or come to believe from this event?


How has this impacted your life?


What beliefs do you have about love and relationships now?


What would you most like to improve or change within your current relationship/s?


If current issues were resolved what would your life look and feel like?


Upcoming workshop: Love Yourself love your life


Create a deeper and more fulfilling relationship with yourself and your loved ones. Sunday 28th April 10 am – 4.30 pm

More details: https://www.gillianroutledge.com/bookings


Contact Gill on:

M: 07866037951 E: gillianroutledge@gmail.com

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